Find Time To Be With Yourself

Do you often feel after a day at work that your brain is so full that you feel tired, dull and stressed? On your way home is your brain still packed with clients you have dealt with, business letters you have written, conversations you have had and problems you have faced during the day?

I believe most of us are familiar with this feeling. Modern life is very demanding. We are always busy, both at work and in private life. Our brain flits from one thing to another rapidly in every waking moment (and during sleep also). It can be difficult to find a spare moment in our hectic life, to slow down the brain and have a moment that belongs to ourselves purely.

I learnt how to find moments to myself on any day from an experience I had in Bangkok three years ago.

My husband and I were having a holiday there. We hired a tuk tuk to take us to the famous Chao Phraya River for a river cruise. We did not know how far the Chao Phraya River was and how long it would take. We did not care anyway, as we had plenty of time. After a quick bargaining on the price, we got on the tuk tuk.

The driver was a forty something local man. Like most Thai, he did not speak very good English but apparently he had no problem with the basic tourist English. While we were quite enjoying our exotic street tour on the tuk tuk, the driver stopped. We had a look around. It was nowhere near the river. As a matter of fact, we found ourselves in a residential area.

‘Can you wait here for five minutes?’ He asked. ‘I need to do some praying. I’ll be right back. Stay here. Don’t move.’

My husband and I looked at each other, stunned and confused. ‘What’s his game?’ we wondered. We were in a strange place where we were left alone. What the hell was going on?

Although we had some suspicion, we waited. There was not much we could do anyway.

In five minutes the driver duly returned, and thanked us for waiting. We carried on with the rest of the trip to the river.

What have I learnt from this tuk tuk trip?

I learnt something from the driver, which is: we should always find some time to be with ourselves, even at work. A driver’s day can be hectic and non-stop in a busy and noisy city like Bangkok. But it was important to him to find some quiet and peaceful moments to be with himself (or to be with his God). The five minutes praying perhaps goes a long way for the rest of the day. As it turned out, we didn’t mind waiting that five minutes at all. People who are in a desperate rush are unlikely to choose tuk tuk as the desirable transportation anyway.

For many of us, a working day is no easier than the life of a tuk tuk driver. Most people find the period after lunch or in mid-afternoon are hard to concentrate, for example. To remain focused, we actually need to ‘empty’ our mind every now and then, to give it a breathing space. Meditation can help to focus our mind and to empty it. It doesn’t have to be long session. I find five minutes meditation at work is very beneficial. I try to do it at least twice a day. Lack of space? I go to the handicapped toilet which is private and usually unused. Difficult to find that extra five minutes? I doubt it. Have you noticed that smokers never fail to find that five minutes every now and then through out the day for a cigarette? If smokers can afford that five minutes, so can you!

To dedicate time to be with ourselves can make us feel centred and being in control. A lot of creativity and inspiration arises from time alone with ourselves. Life can be a rat race. However, if we don’t contemplate and align our 'busy-ness' with our value and purpose, you may end up asking yourself: ‘what is the point?’